pillowbook.caffeinecat

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Found from a community forum:

My wife and I are both in our 70s, both in bad health, struggling just to get by financially. Life has definitely not been a fairytale, a “happily ever after” sort of thing. We both are right now dealing with bad colds and not in the best of moods. Last night we were sitting on our sofa, bundled under blankets, not really watching whatever was on the television, when I looked around our cluttered living room with all of its flotsam of these two lives of ours, and felt incredibly depressed.

I told her, “You know, I never expected that this would be our life together; I really wanted to do better, to have more for us. I’m sorry this is how it’s turned out to be. I wish I could have given you the best.” Her eyes were closed; I looked at her, this wife of mine for over four decades, and could see she wasn’t feeling well at all, could see this face that was a beauty when I married it, now aged like parchment and lined from worry, fatigue, and a very hard life.

You should have seen her back then! She was radiant—that’s the only word I can think of to describe her. She was so beautiful, I’m amazed that she didn’t have suitors crawling in her windows; her dark eyes were like glittering crystals, and that smile! You could see the flowers literally pale when she smiled. She was so full of hope those days, so ready to tackle anything, vigorous, young, excited about the life we were starting as a team, as a couple, “Mr. & Mrs…..”

Without opening her eyes, she slowly smiled, and there was a little faint glimmer of what once was, that confident beauty that made me believe in us, made me believe in myself. All she quietly said was, “I chose my life, I chose you. I know I made the right choice”, and patted my hand. I sat looking at that gnarled, careworn hand patting my own, and knew that this was love.

This is a woman who signed on “for richer or poorer”, and only received *poorer*, who signed on for “in sickness and in health”, and received more sickness–her own, and others–than health, who never got the chance to be that person in the romance, that person in the fairytale, that person who “lived happily ever after.” This is a woman who struggled with me to make ends meet, who did without because she had a husband cursed with health problems and consequently little money. This is a woman who felt the crushing sorrow of losing a child, seemingly aging two decades overnight, a time when we both were consumed with such wrenching pain that we could find no comfort in one another, a time when we considered going our own ways because to look at each other was only a searing reminder of the enormity of the loss we had experienced. This is a woman who could have had, should have had, a better husband, a husband who could have provided for her the way she deserved.

She stayed, however, and that is why I think I know, at the sunset of life, what love truly is. It isn’t an infatuation, a rush of emotion; love is a choice. That is surely what it came down to many times for my wife, and she always chose her life with me. I have not been blessed with many things in life, but I think I have been blessed with true love from a remarkable woman.

Well, thank you for listening to an old man ramble on. What are your thoughts and experiences with love, and what do you think really constitutes true love?

$20 Bike has not broken in to pieces yet. There were times where we would stroll through Downtown to Balboa park, North – South Park, Hillcrest, Pointloma, etc; anything to keep the perk on this butt!

Was I really burning those calories? NO: El Zarape one day, Blue Water another day….

＄２０で買ったおんぼろ自転車で散歩行って来たよー。ダウンタウンからバルボアパーク、ノースパーク、ヒルクレスト、ポイントロマとかで一日３時間づつ運動してかなり快適♥　年で下がりそうなお尻もこれでちょっとは答えてくれるだろうか（＾＾；

運転しててじっくり見れなかった景色もよく体感できたし。運動するのはいいけどやっぱり初めてみかけレストランとかあっちゃう訳で．．。ダイエットにもならん（笑）この前、話題のEl Zarape でストリートタコスを頂いた。海鮮専門のメキシカンらしくて、カラマリブリトーとかもあったけどじっと我慢した。

↑また別の日にオールドタウン近辺でブルーウォーターでフィッシュ＆チップス。好きなお魚とシーズニングでサンド、タコス、サラダ形式で頂ける、列ができる店発見。白ワイン欲しかったけどそこも我慢我慢．．．。

It’s not like this EVERYDAY; Just happen to be there when I’m hungry on a sunny weekend.

毎回食べに行ってる訳ではないよ！週末はどうしてもウロウロしちゃうのさ。

in-n-out protein style and

Based on Christopher Isherwood’s 1964 novel.  Produced and Directed by Tom Ford.

I felt a little hot in every little detail.

15 minutes late on the 3rd row and story was bland but how visually stunning was it?